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Baulderstone

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That's the swo thing to do.

2xiniw.jpg
 

Mankcam

Coiner of Thread-Falls, & Inadvert Founder of Swo'
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But we didn't become swo until Mankcam Mankcam introduced it in 2019...or was it 2018?
I think Swo' was here in dormancy long before I inadvertantly awoke it early this year.

In fact, when I was randomly looking for good rpg forums, I stumbled across the Pub and my inner mentor voice muttered " The Swo' Is Strong In That One".

I instantly turned off my targeting frontal lobe, and have been posting blind here ever since.
 

Baulderstone

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TristramEvans

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Swo is an in-joke that came about from a typo in a thread title here on the Pub a while back. It doesn't mean anything...or it means everything. We just sort of embraced it as a community as the nonsense term that embodies the Pub's soul and spirit.
 

Séadna

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OK. I'm so un-hip that my jeans fall off. Just what is SWO? I've tried the internet, but I'm not convinced that it means what you think it means???!!!

Definitions 1) From the free dictionary or 2) Wikipedia.

Is SeaWorld Orlando that inspiring?
It was supposed to be an edit for a thread about Swordfish Island (See post #3):

 

Séadna

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Now for the real answer.

OK. I'm so un-hip that my jeans fall off. Just what is SWO? I've tried the internet, but I'm not convinced that it means what you think it means???!!!

Definitions 1) From the free dictionary or 2) Wikipedia.

Is SeaWorld Orlando that inspiring?
SeaWorld Orlando is included as part of Swo's 407th Setting Book which details how to run campaigns as marine park managers.

Although I suspect you are just testing us B burbles as early documentation (See Petersen's "Playing at the Swo") indicates you worked with Mankcam Mankcam in the ancient game engine forges from which Swo was born circa 3000 BC.
 

burbles

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Swo is an in-joke that came about from a typo in a thread title here on the Pub a while back. It doesn't mean anything...or it means everything. We just sort of embraced it as a community as the nonsense term that embodies the Pub's soul and spirit.

It was supposed to be an edit for a thread about Swordfish Island (See post #3):

Thanks for the info both of you. The link to the SWO thread was especially useful, as I tried the (relatively new ?) search function....
at which point Post #5 made far more sense.
 

Bunch

E-Rocker is a goose.
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If you don't get swo you haven't been here long enough. Give it time and you will swo with the best of us.
 

Séadna

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Well we've made it through another year of the totalitarian regime here. Let's check up on the progress.

Can we have an actual official position from the admins on swo?
Still lacking. Without clear guidance from the Admins the user base has imploded into philosophical solipsism over this:
You may be asking "What is Swo" and feel that we should define this in the RPG itself. We find this is counterproductive to actually producing RPG Pub like gameplay, as arguing over what does and does not count as Swo brings the game closer to the RPG Pub experience!
I feel your logic is flawed here, as trying to define Swo is not Swo by definition:devil:!
If even a Bulgarian is confused what hope do the rest of us have?

Raleel Raleel 's constant trolling and derailing of any Mythras thread needs to stop. You hate the system, we get it!
Instead of putting a plug in this the Admins have let it run rampant. Now we have Mankcam Mankcam shitting all over Fate and M Moonglum 's "Steve Jackson dumped me so now I hate his games" rants.

What is a Voros?
The mystery has only deepened. The revelation that Voros aka DocSammysWaifu aka Baulderstone aka RPGPundit is involved at all levels of the forum and even has a cloning process and a second form "VorosRisen" has left myself and others shaken.

Can we get a Dumarestito to help Dumarest Dumarest in running all the forum RPGs?
Edgewise Edgewise is doing brilliantly I'll admit, but can he at least be given a complimentary CHiPs motorcycle?

Will there be a deadline on The Butcher The Butcher 's "Pounded In The Butt By Raggi’s LotFP Sales Figures"? A choose your own adventure staring Brazil's number one ripped hung playboy billionaire doctor GM needs to happen.
Well I was ready to go to town on this until I received this draft copy:
You've returned from another successful day of superhot billionaire banging on Praia do Abricó. Entering the hospital with your usual confident swagger a fresh faced intern rushes up to you.

"Sir a fax from Europe!" he says stammering stunned by your good looks and also in English. The hospital staff had recently voted to switch languages for ease of satirising on Anglophone RPG forums.

"Some sort of deadly new condition intern?" you reply.

"No Sir. It's Raggi's new sales figures"

In shock you grab the fax from his hands. By Christ he's increased his sales figures tenfold! Of course that bastard is now in league with nuChaosium, there's no telling what he can do. You rue the day you told him "Pfff Death Frost Doom is shit. If it moves a million units you can bang me in the butt with the sales figures"

"Well nothing to be concerned about..." you begin.

"Sir, he...he's on his way from Helsinki now!"

There's a silence as you approach your private balcony overlooking Rio.

"Sir?"

"Raggi may think he is in control. But he's coming to my home territory. In time he will learn that I am the Butcher and this city is my abattoir"

To assume direct control of Rio: Turn to Page 45

To let Raggi play his hand first: Turn to Page 67

Please add your own new concerns.
 
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The Butcher

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Well we've made it through another year of the totalitarian regime here. Let's check up on the progress.


Still lacking. Without clear guidance from the Admins the user base has imploded into philosophical solipsism over this:


If even a Bulgarian is confused what hope do the rest of us have?


Instead of putting a plug in this the Admins have let it run rampant. Now we have Mankcam Mankcam shitting all over Fate and M Moonglum 's "Steve Jackson dumped me so now I hate his games" rants.


The mystery has only deepened. The revelation that Voros aka DocSammysWaifu aka Baulderstone aka RPGPundit is involved at all levels of the forum and even has a cloning process and a second form "VorosRisen" has left myself and others shaken.


Edgewise is doing brilliantly I'll admit, but can he at least be given a complimentary CHiPs motorcycle?


Well I was ready to go to town on this until I received this draft copy:
You've returned from another successful day of superhot billionaire banging on Praia do Abricó. Entering the hospital with your usual confident swagger a fresh faced intern rushes up to you.

"Sir a fax from Europe!" he says stammering stunned by your good looks and also in English. The hospital staff had recently voted to switch languages for ease of satirising on Anglophone RPG forums.

"Some sort of deadly new condition intern?" you reply.

"No Sir. It's Raggi's new sales figures"

In shock you grab the fax from his hands. By Christ he's increased his sales figures tenfold! Of course that bastard is now in league with nuChaosium, there's no telling what he can do. You rue the day you told him "Pfff Death Frost Doom is shit. If it moves a million units you can bang me in the butt with the sales figures"

"Well nothing to be concerned about..." you begin.

"Sir, he...he's on his way from Helsinki now!"

There's a silence as you approach your private balcony overlooking Rio.

"Sir?"

"Raggi may think he is in control. But he's coming to my home territory. In time he will learn that I am the Butcher and this city is my abattoir"

To assume direct control of Rio: Turn to Page 45

To let Raggi play his hand first: Turn to Page 67

Please add your own new concerns.

This was the absolute, laugh-out-loud highlight of a fairly crappy day. Take a bow, sir. Dr. Chuck would be proud. #theloveisreal
 

Bunch

E-Rocker is a goose.
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Despite the possible alternate hidden interpretations, I think I prefer the 1d20 version. It's a very minor thing, but I feel the extra d20 just makes it feel busy.
That's what she said!
 

Séadna

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Well another year of being forced to discuss RPGs against our will by the tyranical moderation team.

Lots of issues brewing this year! Please add your own.

I hate the staff:

I think number one is that we personally have to develop individual grievances against the staff. This wastes a lot of our time as GMs, so for that reason I am providing 1d5 grievance tables. Roll 1d5 to select your member of staff and roll on the appropriate mod table. You might not like the 1d5, but that's typical of the contrary mods on this forum forcing you to buy DCC dice.

Baulderstone:
1. I feel his avatar is watching me.....judging me.
2. Too reasonable
3. Too Australian
4. Speaks from experience too often. If you don't like a game and want to criticise it, then have the decency to have never played or read it.
5. Mocks us all with play experience of games we dream to even own. Shadows of Estern man, that was cruel :cry:

Black Leaf:
1. BOSR fanatic
2. En Garde fanatic
3. No threads on the Swedish RPG Noir have been posted since he joined the mod staff. And he has never once started a thread specifically praising Fria Ligan. I'm not saying anything directly, but well...
4. Sick of robertsconley bromance
5. In a former life Pierre Seriziat spurned my sister and sullied my name.

TristramEvans:
1. His drawing ability makes me feel inadequate
2. Look at his avatar for crying out loud! He's literally a demon from hell!!! Anung Un Rama!!! He will open the Dragon's prison!!!
3. PHASERIP teasing
4. <Valley Girl Accent> I love his posts, but I'm not you know "in love" with him </Valley Girl accent>
5. Book recommendations are destroying my wallet!!

Apparition:
1. Using Admin privaleges to sell our data to megacorps like Goodman Games and Storybrewers.
2. I don't trust the "man of mystery" air he cultivates
3. Too little forum drama revolves around him. This has to change!!
4. DOWN TIME?! DOWN TIME?! I HAVE TO WAIT A SMALL AMOUNT OF TIME FOR YOU TO IMPROVE THE FORUM FOR MY BENEFIT!! HOW DARE YOU!!
5. Introduced me to the Commodore 64 museum and destroyed my nostalgia. He must be held accountable.

Endless Flight:
1. Where does he get off running a forum for my free entertainment?
2. His love of GI Joe is implicitly aggressive to other 80s cartoons.
3. Pro-Terry McGinnis lunatic. Batman Beyond sucked!!
4. He literally lists his favourite RPGS on his profile. ADMIN BIAS!!! ADMIN BIAS!!!
5. Tommy Brownell favouritism

Of course most of the pales in comparison to the implication in various posts that the staff in fact have private lives that don't involve us. I'm not saying it's definitely true, but let the possibility sink in for a moment.

Disgusting behaviour:

My and others have complained before about E-Rocker, Giganotosaurus and Tulpa Girl and how their non-confrontational attitude poisons the forum. In that light I provide the following PM directly from Tulpa-Girl:
Man I hate Fraiser, almost as much as I hate Illinois!!
I urge the rest of you to supply the PMs Tulpa Girl has sent to you. We all know these anti-Seattalite radio talk show host rants show up in our mailbox. We keep quiet so she can maintain her friendly image. It ends now!

However I'd also like to single out Brock Savage for acts that transgress all forum norms and decency. I have literally seen this perv claim he was wrong and that he has in fact (brace yourself)
changed his mind
I have this phrase in spoilers as I am not sure it makes grammatical sense and is clearly the product of a warped individual. Please ban.

Martial Arts thread:

Can it be kept on topic and not a place for Voros to go full gym bro and brag about his training regime, displaying his pics before:

ezgif-2-81b8c72dcc8a.jpg

and after:
ezgif-2-0ced3dbbc6a8.jpg

Bulgarian Mode:

When are we going to get this?! It's been promised for two years and I still have to put most posts into google translate myself and have the national anthem playing in another tab. It also means I have to head to the Bulgarian store in Dublin for food. At least some sort of RPGPub Prime delivery service would be nice.

Pounded in the :ooh: by Lamentations sales figures:

At least I have received a preview of the next installment in this epic saga.

You race through the Amazon, back flipping over quicksand and strangling any snake, panther or beast the jungle sends your way. It's Raggi's now. He has taken your territory. You, the Butcher, forced to scrape and crawl across your own nation.

After ripping another Boa Constrictor in two, your forty-second shirt today bursts open. Sundered by the effort of constraining your powerful physique. Fortunately it lets you sense a subtle shift in the air currents flowing twixt the lines that sharply separate each solid ab. As you turn a gaggle of Raggi's goons emerge from the tree line. "Poor bastards" you think to yourself as you ignore their rants about random encounter tables and "fuck balance". You try to appeal to their sense of reason, but quickly realise they think this is all a negadungeon. You gain no satisfaction from sending them back to the char gen tables.

Following this and a tiring hike across twelve hexes, you finally reach the dilapidated shack, just where the resistance said it would be. You push open the rusted metal door to look inside. Pitch dark.

"Nobby!! Nobby!!" you cry. "We need you, you're our only hope!". For a moment your spirits drop as only silence greets your cries. But then...

"She's waiting for you" a sensual kiwi accent replies and its source edges into the light. The old koala has seen better days, Raggi's troops have obviously gotten to him before you did. "Are you just going to stay there? Follow me down" he says beckoning to the stairs as he turns on the lights.

As you descend the stairs he throws a question your way. "What's it like out there?"
"A dark fantasy hell hole. The jungle is crawling with dick monsters spewing acid, vagina beasts eating people"
"...Is that really Dark Fantasy? Isn't that just gross?"
"I'm no philosopher, all I know is it was OSR as fuck!"

You finally reach the old basement, tears nearly coming to your eyes as you finally see it.

"Yes Butcher" the wily koala smirks "your old Glitter Boy. Fully repaired and ready for action."
"What's this thing run on?"
"The full Paladium ruleset my friend. Used my old database skills to get every supplement in there. Raggi is used to rules-lite stuff, he won't stand a chance. But I...added something else..." concern on his face as he utters the last part.
"What is it?"
"I...included some narrative elements as well. Flashbacks, the odd metacurrency. They might get you out of a bind"
"Nobby...that's unethical..."
"I used them before myself..." he gestures to the goons dead in the corner "Changed things so I'd prepared booby traps...I'm not proud of it...but I thought you deserved the choice"

The mind of the Butcher cannot be easily grasped by mortals but wrestles with this choice now.

The-Boys2.jpg

To load the narrative abilities into the Glitter Boy turn to Page 89

To slap some sense into Nobby, chastise him for how far he has fallen and begin the "Auckland Redemption" story arc turn to Page 456. Use the Koala damage chart that came with book and roll 1d17.
 
Last edited:

The Butcher

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Well another year of being forced to discuss RPGs against our will by the tyranical moderation team.

Lot's of issues brewing this year! Please add your own.

I hate the staff:

I think number one is that we personally have to develop individual grievances against the staff. This wastes a lot of our time as GMs, so for that reason I am providing 1d5 grievance tables. Roll 1d5 to select your member of staff and roll on the appropriate mod table. You might not like the 1d5, but that's typical of the contrary mods on this forum forcing you to buy DCC dice.

Baulderstone:
1. I feel his avatar is watching me.....judging me.
2. Too reasonable
3. Too Australian
4. Speaks from experience too often. If you don't like a game and want to criticise it, then have the decency to have never played or read it.
5. Mocks us all with play experience of games we dream to even own. Shadows of Estern man, that was cruel :cry:

Black Leaf:
1. BOSR fanatic
2. En Garde fanatic
3. No threads on the Swedish RPG Noir have been posted since he joined the mod staff. And he has never once started a thread specifically praising Fria Ligan. I'm not saying anything directly, but well...
4. Sick of robertsconley bromance
5. In a former life Pierre Seriziat spurned my sister and sullied my name.

TristramEvans:
1. His drawing ability makes me feel inadequate
2. Look at his avatar for crying out loud! He's literally a demon from hell!!! Anung Un Rama!!! He will open the Dragon's prison!!!
3. PHASERIP teasing
4. <Valley Girl Accent> I love his posts, but I'm not you know "in love" with him </Valley Girl accent>
5. Book recommendations are destroying my wallet!!

Apparition:
1. Using Admin privaleges to sell our data to megacorps like Goodman Games and Storybrewers.
2. I don't trust the "man of mystery" air he cultivates
3. Too little forum drama revolves around him. This has to change!!
4. DOWN TIME?! DOWN TIME?! I HAVE TO WAIT A SMALL AMOUNT OF TIME FOR YOU TO IMPROVE THE FORUM FOR MY BENEFIT!! HOW DARE YOU!!
5. Introduced me to the Commodore 64 museum and destroyed my nostalgia. He must be held accountable.

Endless Flight:
1. Where does he get off running a forum for my free entertainment?
2. His love of GI Joe is implicitly aggressive to other 80s cartoons.
3. Pro-Terry McGinnis lunatic. Batman Beyond sucked!!
4. He literally lists his favourite RPGS on his profile. ADMIN BIAS!!! ADMIN BIAS!!!
5. Tommy Brownell favouritism

Of course most of the pales in comparison to the implication in various posts that the staff in fact have private lives that don't involve us. I'm not saying it's definitely true, but let the possibility sink in for a moment.

Disgusting behaviour:

My and others have complained before about E-Rocker, Giganotosaurus and Tulpa Girl and how their non-confrontational attitude poisons the forum. In that light I provide the following PM directly from Tulpa-Girl:

I urge the rest of you to supply the PMs Tulpa Girl has sent to you. We all know these anti-Seattalite radio talk show host rants show up in our mailbox. We keep quiet so she can maintain her friendly image. It ends now!

However I'd also like to single out Brock Savage for acts that transgress all forum norms and decency. I have literally seen this perv claim he was wrong and that he has in fact (brace yourself)
changed his mind
I have this phrase in spoilers as I am not sure it makes grammatical sense and is clearly the product of a warped individual. Please ban.

Martial Arts thread:

Can it be kept on topic and not a place for Voros to go full gym bro and brag about his training regime, displaying his pics before:

View attachment 28975

and after:
View attachment 28974

Bulgarian Mode:

When are we going to get this?! It's been promised for two years and I still have to put most posts into google translate myself and have the national anthem playing in another tab. It also means I have to head to the Bulgarian store in Dublin for food. At least some sort of RPGPub Prime delivery service would be nice.

Pounded in the :ooh: by Lamentations sales figures:

At least I have received a preview of the next installment in this epic saga.

You race through the Amazon, back flipping over quicksand and strangling any snake, panther or beast the jungle sends your way. It's Raggi's now. He has taken your territory. You, the Butcher, forced to scrape and crawl across your own nation.

After ripping another Boa Constrictor in two, your forty-second shirt today bursts open. Sundered by the effort of constraining your powerful physique. Fortunately it lets you sense a subtle shift in the air currents flowing twixt the lines that sharply separate each solid ab. As you turn a gaggle of Raggi's goons emerge from the tree line. "Poor bastards" you think to yourself as you ignore their rants about random encounter tables and "fuck balance". You try to appeal to their sense of reason, but quickly realise they think this is all a negadungeon. You gain no satisfaction from sending them back to the char gen tables.

Following this and a tiring hike across twelve hexes, you finally reach the dilapidated shack, just where the resistance said it would be. You push open the rusted metal door to look inside. Pitch dark.

"Nobby!! Nobby!!" you cry. "We need you, you're our only hope!". For a moment your spirits drop as only silence greets your cries. But then...

"She's waiting for you" a sensual kiwi accent replies and its source edges into the light. The old koala has seen better days, Raggi's troops have obviously gotten to him before you did. "Are you just going to stay there? Follow me down" he says beckoning to the stairs as he turns on the lights.

As you descend the stairs he throws a question your way. "What's it like out there?"
"A dark fantasy hell hole. The jungle is crawling with dick monsters spewing acid, vagina beasts eating people"
"...Is that really Dark Fantasy? Isn't that just gross?"
"I'm no philosopher, all I know is it was OSR as fuck!"

You finally reach the old basement, tears nearly coming to your eyes as you finally see it.

"Yes Butcher" the wily koala smirks "your old Glitter Boy. Fully repaired and ready for action."
"What's this thing run on?"
"The full Paladium ruleset my friend. Used my old database skills to get every supplement in there. Raggi is used to rules-lite stuff, he won't stand a chance. But I...added something else..." concern on his face as he utters the last part.
"What is it?"
"I...included some narrative elements as well. Flashbacks, the odd metacurrency. They might get you out of a bind"
"Nobby...that's unethical..."
"I used them before myself..." he gestures to the goons dead in the corner "Changed things so I'd prepared booby traps...I'm not proud of it...but I thought you deserved the choice"

The mind of the Butcher cannot be easily grasped by mortals but wrestles with this choice now.

View attachment 28976

To load the narrative abilities into the Glitter Boy turn to Page 89

To slap some sense into Nobby, chastise him for how far he has fallen and begin the "Auckland Redemption" story arc turn to Page 456. Use the Koala damage chart that came with book and roll 1d17.
Fuck yeah turn to Page 89. Strip out the convenient Palladium nuclear power source, this baby is Powered by the Apocalypse.
 

Tulpa Girl

"Hello, motherf*ckers!"
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Clearly, Séadna Séadna needs to be baned for having the audacity to not be in easy kidnapping range of me. I think we can all agree that this is fair and just.

That said, because I am magnanimous, I would personally continue to support his Paetron account, as long as he keeps e-mailing me various accounts of hawt, steamy forumposter-on-forumposter action.
 
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