Loving it Here

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Acmegamer

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Wait to you see our dark geesey underbelly....
That's why I never wander out into the forums without my trusty Mk2 auto bread crumb launcher at my side. You never know when you'll need some bread pieces to distract the geese, ducks and other watery fowl. Just never use full auto, it will knock you on your ass ruining your chance at escape as the geese will quickly gather around you and overwhelm you.
 

Stumpydave

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When I were a lad (cue wibbly wobbly flashback) me and my mates 'invented' the great game we called garden hopping. By that we attempted to traverse our local area at night via people's back gardens.

On one of our first forays, we ended up near the end of our street only for my mate Darren to hiss "Don't move!" Being the highly trained posse of 14 year old adventurers that we were, we froze amongst the potted shrubs of some old couple's back garden. .
"What's up?" We whispered back.
"They've got a goose!" Came the reply.

Sure enough, in the twilight gloom there was the unmistakeable profile of one of Satan's feathered serpents! We proper froze.
It didn't move.
It couldn't have seen us yet but it was only a matter of time before it attacked or started honking like a klaxxon and we'd all get done for trespass or worse!

Then Darren does the unimaginable. He reaches out to the goose and starts clucking under his tongue, edging ever closer to the hellbeast.

"What the fuck are you doing!?" We hiss in disbelief. He holds up a hand as if to say 'I've got this.' as we're rooted to the spot in terror. He gets closer and closer to the goose. Surely it'll start honking or worse any minute! Then we'll get caught and we'll have to explain why we're in someone's back garden. If we're lucky we'll just get grounded for life thought the more likely outcome is we'll get our asses handed to us and grounded for life and a criminal record and....My heart is pounding like a jackhammer, I've never been so scared in all my life.

"It's concrete!" chuckles Darren.

The whispered chuckles and claims' I knew it was concrete.' were the only sign of our relief as we crouchwalked to the fence and hoisted ourselves up and out of the garden. Ready to plunge into the next garden and see where we'd end up.
 
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