Real Life and What's Happening...

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So still not out of cast. Trying to do Nanowrimo but life and sleep aren't working well enough to allow me to do more than I've done in two weeks which is a pittance.

So tired.
Plus have these small blister/sores on my hands the doctor thinks is a virus, but they're annoying and itchy.


Life just doesn't let up.

Also really, really bored and wanting something to read, something exciting and a little action, and something cozy (not required in the same book, but not fond of visceral violence)


Maybe I should reread the Mageworlds books...
 
Giganotosaurus said:
Is Ras al Hanout the secret spice mix of Ra's al Ghul?
Click to expand...
I watched a Tasting History video about this. A literal translation is 'the head of the shop' and it's a mix of the best spices the trader has available.

You probably knew that, but I"m not going to pass up a chance to show off my learnin's.
 
Black Vulmea said:
In the words of Tyrion Lannister, "It's BEEN an ADVENTURE!"
Click to expand...

Wow, hard to believe it's been almost a year and a half. Time truly flies.

So, I almost died.

Turns out I have a hereditary heart condition. My heart was pumping only about a third of its capacity, and one of the symptoms was fluid in my lungs that came remarkably close to drowning me - I would spend hours just sitting and concentrating on simply breathing. I thought I was simply old and out-of-shape - and I was that, too - but there wasn't ever going to be a potentially in-shape me before my GP referred me to a cardiologist, who echo'd me, nuke injected me, and angiocath'd me and told me, in so many words, "This is what's happening to your heart. It's a condition we don't really understand, but we can still treat it." I'm now on seven different meds to deal with all of the chaos my faulty pump created and I'm slowly recovering strength and stamina.

That recovery got a big boost a few months back when I had four screws, two plates, and a cage inserted into my lumbar spine. Beginning of the year I finally sought help for terrible lower back pain. I spent five months in physical therapy, which made me much stronger and stable on my feet but did nothing to alleviate the debilitating pain so I finally sought out an orthopedist and got an x-ray that showed my spine looked like The Crooked Man's - two vertebrae were crushing a nerve and basically putting my leg to sleep anytime I stood for more than a few minutes. I could walk and not feel the ground when I put my foot down. Seven weeks later I had surgery and I'm already walking two or three miles a day on flat ground and got an early Christmas gift of trekking poles so I can go 'off-road.' I'm most excited for February, when I can get back on my bicycle AND start hitting the heavy bag - right now I'm restricted to a few minutes a day on the speed bag.

I feel better than I have in years on years. More importantly, I feel excited by what's ahead. I resigned myself to being less than myself, and while it's a good thing to embrace yourself for who you are, it's also quite something to discover you can be something you thought was beyond your grasp. I was a shadow of myself, and while I still have a lot of work to do, I don't doubt for a second I can get to where I want to be.

Modern medicine, man. Fucking miracles.
 
Last edited:
Black Vulmea said:
Wow, hard to believe it's been almost a year and a half. Time truly flies.

So, I almost died.

Turns out I have a hereditary heart condition. My heart was pumping only about a third of its capacity, and one of the symptoms was fluid in my lungs that came remarkably close to drowning me - I would spend hours just sitting and concentrating on simply breathing. I thought I was simply old and out-of-shape - and I was that, too - but there wasn't ever going to be a potentially in-shape me before my GP referred me to a cardiologist, who echo'd me, nuke injected me, and angiocath'd me and told me, in so many words, "This is what's happening to your heart. It's a condition we don't really understand, but we can still treat it." I'm now on seven different meds to deal with all of the chaos my faulty pump created and I'm slowly recovering strength and stamina.

That recovery got a big boost a few months back when I had four screws, two plates, and a cage inserted into my lumbar spine. Beginning of the year I finally sought help for terrible lower back pain. I spent five months in physical therapy, which made me much stronger and stable on my feet but did nothing to alleviate the debilitating pain so I finally sought out an orthopedist and got an x-ray that showed my spine looked like The Crooked Man's - two vertebrae were crushing a nerve and basically putting my leg to sleep anytime I stood for more than a few minutes. I could walk and not feel the ground when I put my foot down. Seven weeks later I had surgery and I'm already walking two or three miles a day on flat ground and got an early Christmas gift of trekking poles so I can go 'off-road.' I'm most excited for February, when I can get back on my bicycle AND start hitting the heavy bag - right now I'm restricted to a few minutes a day on the speed bag.

I feel better than I have in years on years. More importantly, I feel excited by what's ahead. I resigned myself to being less than myself, and while it's a good thing to embrace yourself for who you are, it's also quite something to discover you can be something you thought was beyond your grasp. I was a shadow of myself, and while I still have a lot of work to do, I don't doubt for a second I can get to where I want to be.

Modern medicine, man. Fucking miracles.
Click to expand...
OOf. Glad you are alive!
 
Works been good, I've only had to completely restack a single pallet I knocked over once. School is going well too. This month I'm taking a dry Intro to IT Security class and a bunch of Precalc prep for next month.
Despite being dry, the IT security class has opened my eyes to how horribly vulnerable everything is and makes me want to go off the grid.
Like did you know that most embedded computers (like in cars and fridges and phones) are typically not patched or updated on a regular basis?
 
So, I'm searching for soap on Amazon.com, and this comes up.
1700019810682.png

The blur is NOT MINE. Most likely the advertiser and not Amazon.
I'm no prude. I get that sex sells. But this is Bill Hicks' level selling. On Amazon. Awww, yeaah.
 
rumble said:
So, I'm searching for soap on Amazon.com, and this comes up.
View attachment 71281

The blur is NOT MINE. Most likely the advertiser and not Amazon.
I'm no prude. I get that sex sells. But this is Bill Hicks' level selling. On Amazon. Awww, yeaah.
Click to expand...
I mean I now know of a soap called Carolina Castile so that's good for them!
 
rumble said:
So, I'm searching for soap on Amazon.com, and this comes up.
View attachment 71281

The blur is NOT MINE. Most likely the advertiser and not Amazon.
I'm no prude. I get that sex sells. But this is Bill Hicks' level selling. On Amazon. Awww, yeaah.
Click to expand...
How funny, I was just about to post a similar experience.
Youtube has reached a new low in weird advertising. Forget predatory diabetes cures and bizarre ads about how tinnitus erases your mind, now I'm getting ads for dildos. DILDOS. Last thing I want is to be watching a video during my break at work and get a fucking once in a lifetime offer for a foot long rubber horse dick.
I miss the days when I would get skipabble half hour ads where a crazed mountain man showed you how to make lard while also advertising his book on survivalism.
 
rumble said:
So, I'm searching for soap on Amazon.com, and this comes up.
View attachment 71281

The blur is NOT MINE. Most likely the advertiser and not Amazon.
I'm no prude. I get that sex sells. But this is Bill Hicks' level selling. On Amazon. Awww, yeaah.
Click to expand...
*squint*

Are you sure that’s censor blur and not focus blur? Given the positioning, I kinda wanna say those are her KNEES.
 
Jetstream said:
*squint*

Are you sure that’s censor blur and not focus blur? Given the positioning, I kinda wanna say those are her KNEES.
Click to expand...
And this makes it better how?

This from a playa whose handle is "Jetstream". SMH.

(Not disparaging the name, just agog at the confluence of events.)
 
E-Rocker said:
One of my best friends, who incidentally is also a player in my Savage Worlds game and DM of the D&D 5e game in which I play, got engaged a day or two ago! I'm really happy for her, which is all I told her about it.

But confidentially (ya know, here on this public internet forum, sooo confidential, lol), I'm feeling a bit melancholy. Because her engagement reminds me of how I failed at being married. Twice.
Click to expand...
Oh man. Tell me about it. A year separated and divorce dragging in court.

Every time someone gets engaged or married I smile, congratulate, enjoy the festivities… but deep down I’m profoundly cynical towards the institution of marriage.

And more than a little leery of committed long-term relationships — in fact, I just had a stupid argument with a very special lady that may have cost me something that was shaping up to be really good — but working this one out in therapy.

Black Vulmea said:
Wow, hard to believe it's been almost a year and a half. Time truly flies.

So, I almost died.

Turns out I have a hereditary heart condition. My heart was pumping only about a third of its capacity, and one of the symptoms was fluid in my lungs that came remarkably close to drowning me - I would spend hours just sitting and concentrating on simply breathing. I thought I was simply old and out-of-shape - and I was that, too - but there wasn't ever going to be a potentially in-shape me before my GP referred me to a cardiologist, who echo'd me, nuke injected me, and angiocath'd me and told me, in so many words, "This is what's happening to your heart. It's a condition we don't really understand, but we can still treat it." I'm now on seven different meds to deal with all of the chaos my faulty pump created and I'm slowly recovering strength and stamina.

That recovery got a big boost a few months back when I had four screws, two plates, and a cage inserted into my lumbar spine. Beginning of the year I finally sought help for terrible lower back pain. I spent five months in physical therapy, which made me much stronger and stable on my feet but did nothing to alleviate the debilitating pain so I finally sought out an orthopedist and got an x-ray that showed my spine looked like The Crooked Man's - two vertebrae were crushing a nerve and basically putting my leg to sleep anytime I stood for more than a few minutes. I could walk and not feel the ground when I put my foot down. Seven weeks later I had surgery and I'm already walking two or three miles a day on flat ground and got an early Christmas gift of trekking poles so I can go 'off-road.' I'm most excited for February, when I can get back on my bicycle AND start hitting the heavy bag - right now I'm restricted to a few minutes a day on the speed bag.

I feel better than I have in years on years. More importantly, I feel excited by what's ahead. I resigned myself to being less than myself, and while it's a good thing to embrace yourself for who you are, it's also quite something to discover you can be something you thought was beyond your grasp. I was a shadow of myself, and while I still have a lot of work to do, I don't doubt for a second I can get to where I want to be.

Modern medicine, man. Fucking miracles.
Click to expand...
Jesus, cap’n. Glad to hear from you and gladder still that you’re doing better now.
 
Giganotosaurus said:
Like did you know that most embedded computers (like in cars and fridges and phones) are typically not patched or updated on a regular basis?
Click to expand...
Did you know that also applies to the computers that control your power and water delivery? If this is an area that interests you, boy do I have some people for you to talk to. My office is all of 20’ from a lab that tests this stuff. The folks who run it are good. They have robots and disable Alexa on everything in the lab.
 
Raleel said:
Did you know that also applies to the computers that control your power and water delivery? If this is an area that interests you, boy do I have some people for you to talk to. My office is all of 20’ from a lab that tests this stuff. The folks who run it are good. They have robots and disable Alexa on everything in the lab.
Click to expand...

This is a large part of why I have old books on making stuff. Chances are if I ever really need them, not just for some little hobby project there will have been an internet borne apocalypse. Far less exciting than the usual aliens, nukes, super bug of fiction, but also far more likely. A couple of weeks without power, water, internet and civilization as we know it is doomed. A serious cyber attack on the Icloud alone could do a number on things.

In this regard I'm a bit of a prepper, back up hard drives, thumb drives, dead trees and a generator.
 
spittingimage said:
Oh my sweet summer child. Wait until you get to corporate network security.
Click to expand...
Heh. Generally it seems like it falls into a few categories;
A. Small outfit where the person in charge likes network security so the one or two people dealing with it get lots of leeway to implement and enforce reason & logic.
B. Big outfit where the high ups know that hack problems would be career-ending & criminal charges types of bad so IT is reasonably staffed, funded, & supported to do good.
C. Not as above. Do daily offline backups of your work or just wash your hands of it and await the inevitable wreck with a big ol bag of don't-give-a-fuck.
 
rumble said:
And this makes it better how?

This from a playa whose handle is "Jetstream". SMH.

(Not disparaging the name, just agog at the confluence of events.)
Click to expand...
I mean, pretty much all soap ads involve people in baths or showers.

How is this worse than some buff dude sudsing his chest up to “Zest-fully clean!”?
 
Jetstream said:
I mean, pretty much all soap ads involve people in baths or showers.

How is this worse than some buff dude sudsing his chest up to “Zest-fully clean!”?
Click to expand...
It's not a gender or environment issue.
It's about staging/posing. It's pretty blatant here.

The subject is laying on her back, centered in the shot, NOT ACTUALLY SOAPING. Eyes lidded but otherwise directly looking at the camera, hands over shoulders, baring the chest.

Let's go with those knees, shall we? Let's go a step further and graciously allow that they're supposed to strategically cover the breasts for modesty. If the knees are that far up, and you're, uh, "shooting" that scene...what are you really looking at?

The implication is that that's not soap, and no one's getting clean in this scene.

Contrast that with soap ads that have a shoulder shot of someone actually holding soap and sudsing up, or standing under a shower of clean water that's aimed off center, or standing or sitting so their focus is on some neutral fixed point with at most one arm raised. Sometimes it's an angled back shot that stops a ways above the tailbone.
Those are the soap ads I remember fondly.
 
The Butcher said:
And more than a little leery of committed long-term relationships — in fact, I just had a stupid argument with a very special lady that may have cost me something that was shaping up to be really good — but working this one out in therapy.
Click to expand...
A sign I drove past today said "Don't make long term plans with seasonal people". Advice I've had to learn the hard way.
The other side of the sign said "Chuck Norris learned to read from a book". and I'm not fully sure what nugget of wisdom that is supposed to impart.

Raleel said:
Did you know that also applies to the computers that control your power and water delivery? If this is an area that interests you, boy do I have some people for you to talk to. My office is all of 20’ from a lab that tests this stuff. The folks who run it are good. They have robots and disable Alexa on everything in the lab.
Click to expand...
Man all this stuff involving hacking embedded and industrial computers is really fascinating to me. Like pacemakers! Pacemakers are almost never updated, but are connected to specialized and vulnerable computers to check that they're working right. Can you imagine the damage malware could do if it infected the reading tool and then infected every pacemaker it connected to?
Hopefully people are starting to come around to the idea that they need to make every computer secure after the wave of Ransomwares, the Colonial Pipeline and Stuxnet.
 
Last edited:
rumble said:
It's not a gender or environment issue.
It's about staging/posing. It's pretty blatant here.

The subject is laying on her back, centered in the shot, NOT ACTUALLY SOAPING. Eyes lidded but otherwise directly looking at the camera, hands over shoulders, baring the chest.

Let's go with those knees, shall we? Let's go a step further and graciously allow that they're supposed to strategically cover the breasts for modesty. If the knees are that far up, and you're, uh, "shooting" that scene...what are you really looking at?

The implication is that that's not soap, and no one's getting clean in this scene.

Contrast that with soap ads that have a shoulder shot of someone actually holding soap and sudsing up, or standing under a shower of clean water that's aimed off center, or standing or sitting so their focus is on some neutral fixed point with at most one arm raised. Sometimes it's an angled back shot that stops a ways above the tailbone.
Those are the soap ads I remember fondly.
Click to expand...
Mate, you are seriously overthinking that ad.
 
Frack me. Tylenol with codeine is making me way cloudier than the normal hydrocodone/pain med I had that was stronger, and I keep whacking my right ankle with the knee scooter I use for my left foot. I keep tearing open the scratch :sad:
 
Black Vulmea said:
Wow, hard to believe it's been almost a year and a half. Time truly flies.

So, I almost died.

Turns out I have a hereditary heart condition. My heart was pumping only about a third of its capacity, and one of the symptoms was fluid in my lungs that came remarkably close to drowning me - I would spend hours just sitting and concentrating on simply breathing. I thought I was simply old and out-of-shape - and I was that, too - but there wasn't ever going to be a potentially in-shape me before my GP referred me to a cardiologist, who echo'd me, nuke injected me, and angiocath'd me and told me, in so many words, "This is what's happening to your heart. It's a condition we don't really understand, but we can still treat it." I'm now on seven different meds to deal with all of the chaos my faulty pump created and I'm slowly recovering strength and stamina.

That recovery got a big boost a few months back when I had four screws, two plates, and a cage inserted into my lumbar spine. Beginning of the year I finally sought help for terrible lower back pain. I spent five months in physical therapy, which made me much stronger and stable on my feet but did nothing to alleviate the debilitating pain so I finally sought out an orthopedist and got an x-ray that showed my spine looked like The Crooked Man's - two vertebrae were crushing a nerve and basically putting my leg to sleep anytime I stood for more than a few minutes. I could walk and not feel the ground when I put my foot down. Seven weeks later I had surgery and I'm already walking two or three miles a day on flat ground and got an early Christmas gift of trekking poles so I can go 'off-road.' I'm most excited for February, when I can get back on my bicycle AND start hitting the heavy bag - right now I'm restricted to a few minutes a day on the speed bag.

I feel better than I have in years on years. More importantly, I feel excited by what's ahead. I resigned myself to being less than myself, and while it's a good thing to embrace yourself for who you are, it's also quite something to discover you can be something you thought was beyond your grasp. I was a shadow of myself, and while I still have a lot of work to do, I don't doubt for a second I can get to where I want to be.

Modern medicine, man. Fucking miracles.
Click to expand...
Jesus Wept, dude. Life decided to put you through the wringer and then some. Now that you’re out the other side, here’s to you getting back to being outdoors and traipsing about the wilderness! :drink:
 
Forgot about it but i guess it's a good story worth a What's happening thread post. And even a title. Fancy fancy.

Terror of the Sheitan GILF
A tale of public transportation and the people you find there. True events with an unncessary amount of exclamation points and vulgarity! For comedic effect!

About a week ago, on monday the 6th of November, year of our Lord Urdlen 2023 I had a very rare random monster spawn as I took the bus. It is the toll, the law of nature : Urdlen rolls 2d6 for you each time you enter one. But this time it was the NPC known as Granny Sheitan, aka The GILF of Sexual Harassment. I was not prepared!

So I'm sat back turned to the bus main door and from the corner of my vision I see a lady 50+ with high heels. UBB pretends to be a tough, vice ridden gnome here in the PUB, but IRL he is a goody-two-shoes of the worst kind, absolute chivalrytard. So I offer her my seat. Grave mistake !

« No, thanks, no, there's some room here… » she sits right next and mutters I don't know what to some kid that was already sat there, some 11-13 yo girl. Seems to know her. Probably a grand-daughter, niece or whatever. Suddenly I hear the combat music starting ! She casts Spell Sequencer ! Greater Malison + Chaos x2 !

She turns to me and looks me right in the eyes ! « Unless I can sit on your lap. Haha »

« Haha » What ? I fail my save horribly ! Noooooooo ! I can only laugh in confusion ! Damnation ! And she insists ! She wants to grind her old ass against youthful UBB cock ! She is ravenous ! She is on the prowl ! On the prowl for cock !

Now the disgusting sickos among you might think what's the matter, it's like a compliment – was she hot ? Not ugly I guess. And yes it usually feels good to know the mojo's still there, even if I've got to decline. Usually. But did I mention the litteral child there ? Looking at me, looking at gran gran, giggling like a little imp at mamy's cock haggling antics ! Doesn't even seem phazed ! What madness is this and how many time was she exposed to this nonsense ! And she insists like 4 times ! She gives arguments ! I am getting wisdom drained from the psionic onslaught ! She even tells the kid how she wants to sit on « le monsieur »'s lap ! That's not good mojo ! That's cursed mojo of evil ! Nightmare mojo of bleak desolation !

Urdlen save me from this demon-cringe I do not deserve this fate !

Thankfully Urdlen, seeing his champion defeated by the succubus witch, answered with a divine intervention and she got off the bus not to long after. But she didnt stop for like 10 minutes and was still eyeing me with lustful old whore eyes trying to cast charm person or something as she walked off ! And I was there sitting like a moron with the akwardest laugh of my adult years ! Nooooooo ! Defeat ! Defeat at the hands of the Sheitan GILF !

But I have learned my lesson. Next time some old lady enters the bus I will not take chances. I will not offer my place. I will cast Time Stop from a scroll and behead all GILFs in sight with dual katanas. She is obviously a high level wizard/psionicist instead of the typical level 3 Thief/Alcoholics that randomly spawn at the back of the bus. I just cannot take chances. It has to be done.
 
Urdlen's best boy said:
Forgot about it but i guess it's a good story worth a What's happening thread post. And even a title. Fancy fancy.

Terror of the Sheitan GILF
A tale of public transportation and the people you find there. True events with an unncessary amount of exclamation points and vulgarity! For comedic effect!
[...]
Click to expand...
And of course, the user profile says "Deep Crawler".

[No further commentary before coffee, and then I'll be awake enough to know to pass.]
 
Urdlen's best boy said:
Forgot about it but i guess it's a good story worth a What's happening thread post. And even a title. Fancy fancy.

Terror of the Sheitan GILF
A tale of public transportation and the people you find there. True events with an unncessary amount of exclamation points and vulgarity! For comedic effect!

About a week ago, on monday the 6th of November, year of our Lord Urdlen 2023 I had a very rare random monster spawn as I took the bus. It is the toll, the law of nature : Urdlen rolls 2d6 for you each time you enter one. But this time it was the NPC known as Granny Sheitan, aka The GILF of Sexual Harassment. I was not prepared!

So I'm sat back turned to the bus main door and from the corner of my vision I see a lady 50+ with high heels. UBB pretends to be a tough, vice ridden gnome here in the PUB, but IRL he is a goody-two-shoes of the worst kind, absolute chivalrytard. So I offer her my seat. Grave mistake !

« No, thanks, no, there's some room here… » she sits right next and mutters I don't know what to some kid that was already sat there, some 11-13 yo girl. Seems to know her. Probably a grand-daughter, niece or whatever. Suddenly I hear the combat music starting ! She casts Spell Sequencer ! Greater Malison + Chaos x2 !

She turns to me and looks me right in the eyes ! « Unless I can sit on your lap. Haha »

« Haha » What ? I fail my save horribly ! Noooooooo ! I can only laugh in confusion ! Damnation ! And she insists ! She wants to grind her old ass against youthful UBB cock ! She is ravenous ! She is on the prowl ! On the prowl for cock !

Now the disgusting sickos among you might think what's the matter, it's like a compliment – was she hot ? Not ugly I guess. And yes it usually feels good to know the mojo's still there, even if I've got to decline. Usually. But did I mention the litteral child there ? Looking at me, looking at gran gran, giggling like a little imp at mamy's cock haggling antics ! Doesn't even seem phazed ! What madness is this and how many time was she exposed to this nonsense ! And she insists like 4 times ! She gives arguments ! I am getting wisdom drained from the psionic onslaught ! She even tells the kid how she wants to sit on « le monsieur »'s lap ! That's not good mojo ! That's cursed mojo of evil ! Nightmare mojo of bleak desolation !

Urdlen save me from this demon-cringe I do not deserve this fate !

Thankfully Urdlen, seeing his champion defeated by the succubus witch, answered with a divine intervention and she got off the bus not to long after. But she didnt stop for like 10 minutes and was still eyeing me with lustful old whore eyes trying to cast charm person or something as she walked off ! And I was there sitting like a moron with the akwardest laugh of my adult years ! Nooooooo ! Defeat ! Defeat at the hands of the Sheitan GILF !

But I have learned my lesson. Next time some old lady enters the bus I will not take chances. I will not offer my place. I will cast Time Stop from a scroll and behead all GILFs in sight with dual katanas. She is obviously a high level wizard/psionicist instead of the typical level 3 Thief/Alcoholics that randomly spawn at the back of the bus. I just cannot take chances. It has to be done.
Click to expand...
In the Rest Home you’ll wish you’d made a different choice there. :devil:
 
If you want to enter the lair of the Granny Succubus I cannot dissuade you. But I suggest you take a team of men with you to exhaust her resources before going in. Even a human barbarian with 18 Con and a big two handed sword has little chance of winning alone against such an arcane powerhouse.
 
Giganotosaurus said:
Works been good, I've only had to completely restack a single pallet I knocked over once. School is going well too. This month I'm taking a dry Intro to IT Security class and a bunch of Precalc prep for next month.
Despite being dry, the IT security class has opened my eyes to how horribly vulnerable everything is and makes me want to go off the grid.
Like did you know that most embedded computers (like in cars and fridges and phones) are typically not patched or updated on a regular basis?
Click to expand...
And that the computer that runs the critical functions in your car is completely exposed to all the non-essential electronics, and can thus be hacked through any of the interfaces, and even through the connections to the mirrors? Or remotely?
 
Urdlen's best boy said:
Forgot about it but i guess it's a good story worth a What's happening thread post. And even a title. Fancy fancy.

Terror of the Sheitan GILF
A tale of public transportation and the people you find there. True events with an unncessary amount of exclamation points and vulgarity! For comedic effect!

About a week ago, on monday the 6th of November, year of our Lord Urdlen 2023 I had a very rare random monster spawn as I took the bus. It is the toll, the law of nature : Urdlen rolls 2d6 for you each time you enter one. But this time it was the NPC known as Granny Sheitan, aka The GILF of Sexual Harassment. I was not prepared!

So I'm sat back turned to the bus main door and from the corner of my vision I see a lady 50+ with high heels. UBB pretends to be a tough, vice ridden gnome here in the PUB, but IRL he is a goody-two-shoes of the worst kind, absolute chivalrytard. So I offer her my seat. Grave mistake !

« No, thanks, no, there's some room here… » she sits right next and mutters I don't know what to some kid that was already sat there, some 11-13 yo girl. Seems to know her. Probably a grand-daughter, niece or whatever. Suddenly I hear the combat music starting ! She casts Spell Sequencer ! Greater Malison + Chaos x2 !

She turns to me and looks me right in the eyes ! « Unless I can sit on your lap. Haha »

« Haha » What ? I fail my save horribly ! Noooooooo ! I can only laugh in confusion ! Damnation ! And she insists ! She wants to grind her old ass against youthful UBB cock ! She is ravenous ! She is on the prowl ! On the prowl for cock !

Now the disgusting sickos among you might think what's the matter, it's like a compliment – was she hot ? Not ugly I guess. And yes it usually feels good to know the mojo's still there, even if I've got to decline. Usually. But did I mention the litteral child there ? Looking at me, looking at gran gran, giggling like a little imp at mamy's cock haggling antics ! Doesn't even seem phazed ! What madness is this and how many time was she exposed to this nonsense ! And she insists like 4 times ! She gives arguments ! I am getting wisdom drained from the psionic onslaught ! She even tells the kid how she wants to sit on « le monsieur »'s lap ! That's not good mojo ! That's cursed mojo of evil ! Nightmare mojo of bleak desolation !

Urdlen save me from this demon-cringe I do not deserve this fate !

Thankfully Urdlen, seeing his champion defeated by the succubus witch, answered with a divine intervention and she got off the bus not to long after. But she didnt stop for like 10 minutes and was still eyeing me with lustful old whore eyes trying to cast charm person or something as she walked off ! And I was there sitting like a moron with the akwardest laugh of my adult years ! Nooooooo ! Defeat ! Defeat at the hands of the Sheitan GILF !

But I have learned my lesson. Next time some old lady enters the bus I will not take chances. I will not offer my place. I will cast Time Stop from a scroll and behead all GILFs in sight with dual katanas. She is obviously a high level wizard/psionicist instead of the typical level 3 Thief/Alcoholics that randomly spawn at the back of the bus. I just cannot take chances. It has to be done.
Click to expand...
FD0596EF-09B1-4867-BC0F-AC17325A2DA0.jpeg
 
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