Real Life and What's Happening...

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I am getting my wife a mug that says 4 hours out of every 5 hours of a meeting could be an email. SHe is in meetings from about 6:30AM to 7:30PM. I don't see how she gets anything done.

Protip: That's the whole point of meetings.
 
I've now shifted completely to being a part time self employed writer and a full time carer for my partner. The latter one is kinda weird; she has MS and doesn't need "care" a lot of the time, but it's now a situation where it feels a bad idea to go out for a full day in case she has a fall etc. It feels strangely like taking early retirement for both of us, but sadly without the money that would involve.
 
The latter one is kinda weird; she has MS and doesn't need "care" a lot of the time, but it's now a situation where it feels a bad idea to go out for a full day in case she has a fall etc.

I'm guessing her MS is of a degree where she might go days or even weeks without anything particularly detrimental happening, but when an attack hits it can be pretty demoralizing, not to mention disconcerting to anyone nearby not familiar with why it's happening. Having someone who knows why it's happening, how to help when an attack occurs, and the warning signs to look for to get ready for (and possibly help to minimalize) an attack is going to be a big boon to her.
 
I'm guessing her MS is of a degree where she might go days or even weeks without anything particularly detrimental happening, but when an attack hits it can be pretty demoralizing, not to mention disconcerting to anyone nearby not familiar with why it's happening. Having someone who knows why it's happening, how to help when an attack occurs, and the warning signs to look for to get ready for (and possibly help to minimalize) an attack is going to be a big boon to her.
It's actually even rarer than that. She has remitting-relapsing and so far at least we're talking years between flare ups. (And there's only two that have been confirmed).

So far (touch wood) her only issues have been mobility. A lot of that is that we lived in a flat at the top of a flight of stairs before she first got it. We've moved now, but as you can imagine that combined with COVID wasn't great for her being able to exercise regularly. So the problem's at least 50% that as well as MS.

That should be getting resolved now though; she's on the waiting list to start doing physiotherapy which we're pretty sure is going to help a lot.
 
It's actually even rarer than that. She has remitting-relapsing and so far at least we're talking years between flare ups. (And there's only two that have been confirmed).

So far (touch wood) her only issues have been mobility. A lot of that is that we lived in a flat at the top of a flight of stairs before she first got it. We've moved now, but as you can imagine that combined with COVID wasn't great for her being able to exercise regularly. So the problem's at least 50% that as well as MS.

That should be getting resolved now though; she's on the waiting list to start doing physiotherapy which we're pretty sure is going to help a lot.
I'm glad to hear its going as well as could be so far man. I don't do prayer, but I'll be thinking of you.
 
Reasons why I may have been having issues with getting the prescriptions for one of the family members I take care of:

1. A pharmacy he uses had his first name as “Randy” in their system. It is not “Randy.”

2. The doctor who prescribed the Rxs kept referring to him as “Mister Oz.”

The very idea I’d be related to Kryptonian scum.
 
Reasons why I may have been having issues with getting the prescriptions for one of the family members I take care of:

1. A pharmacy he uses had his first name as “Randy” in their system. It is not “Randy.”

2. The doctor who prescribed the Rxs kept referring to him as “Mister Oz.”
Yeah I don't really grok the pharmacy and prescription world. Some of them are really fucking strict and others are irresponsibly lax. My father was able to get tons of inexpensive, legal narcotics from a network of shady doctors and no-questions-asked mom n' pop pharmacies for many years. When I say tons I mean, "enough to sell or give away after taking care of his own habit."

On the other hand, the one time I filled a prescription for narcotics at a big chain pharmacy after a major surgery I was interrogated like a criminal until I showed them my bandages.
 
Yeah I don't really grok the pharmacy and prescription world. Some of them are really fucking strict and others are irresponsibly lax. My father was able to get tons of inexpensive, legal narcotics from a network of shady doctors and no-questions-asked mom n' pop pharmacies for many years. When I say tons I mean, "enough to sell or give away after taking care of his own habit."


My introduction into fraud investigation was through the world of pharmaceuticals. After all these years the only case I remember involved a practice and controlled substance prescriptions being sent out like e-mail: Going everywhere and not a single physical signature among them.



Turned out it wasn’t an attempt at fraud, instead being my first encounter with a doctor with a god-complex who thought signing prescriptions was beneath him, despite being the law.
 
Turned out it wasn’t an attempt at fraud, instead being my first encounter with a doctor with a god-complex who thought signing prescriptions was beneath him, despite being the law.
Isn't that all doctors?
 
Absolutely not.
I'm not convinced - if they don't think they're God, they're clearly not exercising their doctor muscles to their full potential. Probably those part timers that haven't yet achieved Consultant level.
(I swear Doctors are playing a fully immersive VR MMO where they grind for XP to get better gear and access to more demanding raids).
 
Isn't that all doctors?

I’ve had many experiences with them from the “altruistic” to the “I am God” ends of the spectrum. Sadly, I’ve only known one on the latter end who lost his medical license for the fuck-ups he committed on patients.
 
I'm not convinced - if they don't think they're God, they're clearly not exercising their doctor muscles to their full potential. Probably those part timers that haven't yet achieved Consultant level.
(I swear Doctors are playing a fully immersive VR MMO where they grind for XP to get better gear and access to more demanding raids).
there are certainly bad ones, but all is a very strong statement. I can think of three good ones off the top of my head, and that's only in my tiny scope of the world.

It's important to remember that doctors are human, and even without malicious intent, mistakes happen. They try very very hard to avoid them, but ultimately we do not have perfect knowledge of the body. trying to troubleshoot a system you do not have perfect knowledge of is ridiculously hard.
 
Reasons why I may have been having issues with getting the prescriptions for one of the family members I take care of:

1. A pharmacy he uses had his first name as “Randy” in their system. It is not “Randy.”

2. The doctor who prescribed the Rxs kept referring to him as “Mister Oz.”

The very idea I’d be related to Kryptonian scum.
L
Isn't that all doctors?
Definitely not.
 
I'm not convinced - if they don't think they're God, they're clearly not exercising their doctor muscles to their full potential. Probably those part timers that haven't yet achieved Consultant level.
(I swear Doctors are playing a fully immersive VR MMO where they grind for XP to get better gear and access to more demanding raids).
I believe you have had bad experiences sure but I have had fantastic life changing experiences. It all depends on what the problem is and how capable and caring the doctor is.
 
I think you're reading a degree of anti-doctor intent into my posts which isn't really there. My posts are meant to be a light hearted generalisation which wouldn't stand up to any sort of scrutiny.

For the record I've worked with some absolutely amazing doctors who put their heart and soul into helping people. I've also worked with some utter scumbags who should have been struck by lightning when taking the Hippocratic oath. The godlike tend to fall somewhere in the middle.
 
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I think you're reading a degree of anti-doctor intent into my posts which isn't really there. My posts are meant to be a light hearted generalisation which wouldn't stand up to any sort of scrutiny.

For the record I've worked with some absolutely amazing doctors who put their heart and soul into helping people. I've also worked with some utter scumbags who should have been struck by lightning when taking the Hippocratic oath. The godlike teens to fall somewhere in the middle.
I stand corrected as I WAS misreading an anti doctor animus in your posts. I can see someone that is very talented could get a God complex but I haven’t experienced it yet. I don’t think I have ever had a malicious or bad doctor but I have certainly had doctors that got things wrong and then increased the problem by doubling down on their opinions. I have also had primary care doctors that called me on a Sunday morning from a Starbucks because “he has been discussing my case over coffee with other doctors “ and he wants to try something non traditional.. I have had other doctors visit me in the hospital even though they didn’t have admitting privileges there and on one occasion when I had pneumonia I had a doctor come to my house because he couldn’t get ahold of me and he was worried.

in short, it’s my view that doctors are among the biggest blessings on this earth and I probably wouldn’t be here if that weren’t the case.
 
Funnily enough my post was written and aimed more in response to Raleel but yours fit anyway.

In my time as a nurse I met some absolute saints who I would have walked through fire for, if they said it was what a patient needed. I also met some who I would have happily thrown into that same fire. Curiously enough most of those with god delusions are in the former category.
 
Funnily enough my post was written and aimed more in response to Raleel but yours fit anyway.

In my time as a nurse I met some absolute saints who I would have walked through fire for, if they said it was what a patient needed. I also met some who I would have happily thrown into that same fire. Curiously enough most of those with god delusions are in the former category.
there are certainly some god delusions ones there. My wife's obstetric surgeon didn't have a god complex, but he definitely needed a PR person - he was very bad at empathy and where his mouth was going. now, it's good that he was dealing my wife and I who have a particular perspective, but things like "talking about national geographic moments over the body of your miscarried baby" and "talking about a doolah who had a client shove capsaicin up her butt to promote labor and that ended badly for mom and baby over my own child who was in the NICU" was probably not the best course of action. In the former example we were warned by the nurses it was so common.
 
Medical schools at one point and maybe still do need a whole lot more courses on bedside manner. I once had a doctor stare at a clip board and tell me it's either testicular cancer or just a small lump that will go away and walk out of the room. That was the appointment. I wasn't even sure if he was coming back. Not what I wanted to hear in my 20s. It wasn't cancer.
 
I had one charmer who wouldn't prescribe lorazepam for a distressed and anxious patient because (and I paraphrase) 'you nurses only wanted it on the charts so you can have a quiet shift.'

His continued existence is testament only to my not wanting to go to prison for him.
 
I had a urologist leave for a phone call immediately after removing the camera from a Cystoscopy. No explanation as to whether or not we were done, nor if he got answers to what we were looking for.
Just me sitting alone in the exam room with my pants off for 5 minutes.
 
For the record I've worked with some absolutely amazing doctors who put their heart and soul into helping people. I've also worked with some utter scumbags who should have been struck by lightning when taking the Hippocratic oath. The godlike tend to fall somewhere in the middle.
I've worked with the kind of doctors that have to be instructed to step out of line at the coffee counter and head for the nearest exit when the fire alarm rings.
 
I had a urologist leave for a phone call immediately after removing the camera from a Cystoscopy. No explanation as to whether or not we were done, nor if he got answers to what we were looking for.
Just me sitting alone in the exam room with my pants off for 5 minutes.

I feel the need to share that the doctor I mentioned above who lost his medical license was a urologist.
 
So I'm worried one of the folks I play D&D with might be an addict.

He's claimed to be in financial trouble because his flatmate committed suicide owing a load of money and they've had to find a lot of money at short notice to keep the rent, utilities and suchlike. I've given him the benefit of the doubt on that as it could really have happened. But, he just messaged me at 10 tonight wanting £100 urgently. That's the straw that broke the camel's back for credibility - until now I've been a little suspicious but taken it on trust. Now I'm quite a bit more worried he might be scamming me for money to buy drugs.

If that's the case I'm not even mad at him because that's what addicts do. However, the one thing you don't do with addicts is give them money that they can buy drugs with.

Some years ago, I knew a chap in Italy (a friend of my ex's) who was an addict and broke. We gave him some money to help him out of a spot and then went to visit not very long after. He had scabs all over his legs where he had been injecting.

I think I will have to have a hard talk with this chap. I've got no idea how to even start to stage an intervention with an addict, or whether I should even get involved. It's not even confirmed, just a suspicion.

Thanks for listening. I need to vent.
 
Medical schools at one point and maybe still do need a whole lot more courses on bedside manner. I once had a doctor stare at a clip board and tell me it's either testicular cancer or just a small lump that will go away and walk out of the room. That was the appointment. I wasn't even sure if he was coming back. Not what I wanted to hear in my 20s. It wasn't cancer.

There is a reason many of the best doctors started off as a lower level medical practitioner, medical corpsman in the military, paramedic, nurse, respiratory therapist etc. That experience provided them with people skills which typically are not taught in medical school. I don't know if it has improved but it used to be common that doctors often didn't even see a patient 1 on 1 until very late in their education or even until their residency. When you just observe procedures being done to a patient it kind of desensitizes you that they are people and not things. Makes it more like working on a car.
 
I'm not convinced - if they don't think they're God, they're clearly not exercising their doctor muscles to their full potential. Probably those part timers that haven't yet achieved Consultant level.
(I swear Doctors are playing a fully immersive VR MMO where they grind for XP to get better gear and access to more demanding raids).
Or maybe they exercised their doctor muscles to such high performance that they tore them. Which is my way of hinting that reality has a way of humbling even the best people.

The grind is real tho.

Medical schools at one point and maybe still do need a whole lot more courses on bedside manner. I once had a doctor stare at a clip board and tell me it's either testicular cancer or just a small lump that will go away and walk out of the room. That was the appointment. I wasn't even sure if he was coming back. Not what I wanted to hear in my 20s. It wasn't cancer.
There is only so much that sensitivity training can achieve. It takes a real commitment, an intrinsic drive to be better and to do better by people, and of course experience teaches like nothing else.
 
Or maybe they exercised their doctor muscles to such high performance that they tore them. Which is my way of hinting that reality has a way of humbling even the best people.

The grind is real tho.


There is only so much that sensitivity training can achieve. It takes a real commitment, an intrinsic drive to be better and to do better by people, and of course experience teaches like nothing else.
I'd heard one of the largest factors in determining whether or not a doctor gets sued for malpractice is their bedside manner. You can be an objectively worse doctor but not get sued for screwing up if you're just nice. I feel that is probably one of the best ways to convince a maybe emotionally detached but analytically capable person that there is monetary value in being kind.
 
However, the one thing you don't do with addicts is give them money that they can buy drugs with.
Agree, don't beat yourself up for not giving cash. A lifetime of experience around addicts and recovery programs has taught me to never give cash handouts. There are many ways you can help someone in need without giving cash. I will help an addict get a job, buy them dinner, drive them to their sobriety program and give them a place to rest their head at night but no cash hand outs, ever.

I started my four day weekend by getting a shave and haircut. I decided to get a nose and ear wax- there was a small amount of discomfort but it was better than tweezing (which I have doing for years). Only the hair close to the edge of the nostril is safe to remove so maybe people are doing it wrong?
 
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I had someone recommended to me as a friend on Facebook. Took about a minute to figure out from their public posts who they were here on the Pub.

Some people’s creep game is hella weak.
Was it me? I saw someone in another group with your name so I clicked. If not don't be surprised if FB recommends me to you
 
There is only so much that sensitivity training can achieve.
Especially with people lacking empathy and likely displaying other narcissistic tendencies.

convince a maybe emotionally detached but analytically capable person that there is monetary value in being kind
That's probably the only way to get a narcissist to display anything resembling empathy.
 
Especially with people lacking empathy and likely displaying other narcissistic tendencies.


That's probably the only way to get a narcissist to display anything resembling empathy.
Of course narcissists get drawn to healthcare, and to Medicine in particular, like flies to honey. The perception of power over life and death, as well as higher earnings and respect, appeal to them.

Nevertheless, I feel the majority of “bad” doctors are not intrinsically pathological personalities, just regular people that have been poorly equipped by life to deal with the harrowing emotional complexity of having humans at their physical and mental lowest look at them for solutions, and/or the many external stressors plaguing healthcare providers today.
 
Was it me? I saw someone in another group with your name so I clicked. If not don't be surprised if FB recommends me to you

Ironically, it’s someone I’ve never spoken with on the Pub, as they’re laser-focused on one RPG in all their posts here, and what I know of it wouldn’t fill a thimble. All their public posts on Facebook are about the same game, almost word-for-word in one case to a post of theirs I read on here, so it wasn’t like I had to flex my investigative skills from work.
 
I had someone recommended to me as a friend on Facebook. Took about a minute to figure out from their public posts who they were here on the Pub.

Some people’s creep game is hella weak.
Love your awkwardness at the invite. Sent you one.
 
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